


baby, it's hard but you make it easier

by ringthealarm



Category: Ariana Grande (Musician), Fifth Harmony (Band), Pop Music RPF
Genre: F/F, Mentions of Anxiety, lapslock
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-01-05
Updated: 2019-01-05
Packaged: 2019-10-04 03:51:21
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,582
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17297228
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ringthealarm/pseuds/ringthealarm
Summary: lavender and vanilla.





	baby, it's hard but you make it easier

**Author's Note:**

> armani crusaders, stand up! i'm so excited for the sweetener tour and their future interactions so this is dedicated to that.

ariana was angry. she felt the room spin as she put most of her weight on to a wooden table. she hated when she couldn't get her emotions in check if it was just for a minute. even when one of the minor reasons she went to therapy was for anger management, on top of trauma, depression, and anxiety in the first place. she felt every minuscule thing from that day crash into her like waves and she couldn't hold on to the table anymore, so she felt her petite body slumped slowly on the also wooden floor. normally she would feel embarrassed being slouched in the middle of the floor like this but she couldn't move nor hardly breathe, and luckily, no one else was in the room. she tried to breathe in and out but it felt like lead was currently running through her bloodstream and pressing down on her lungs. she tried so much to calm herself but her body just kept shaking and tears were streaming down her face in agony. fuck these attacks, seriously.

"ariana?"  
  
_fuck._  
  
she heard the door creak open and the voice was normani. ariana couldn't even speak so she just stayed crouched down against the leg of the table in the slightly right side of the room. normani saw her at once when she walked in completely and rushed by her side. normani knew she got anxiety/panic attacks but she never saw one in action like this or one this bad. normani was now facing in front of her, her eyebrows furrowed, struggling how to handle this.  
  
"mani? i-i..." ariana choked out in a panicked manner when she finally found the strength to speak. she couldn't even get the sentence out. nomani then took one of ariana's delicate hands and traced very light circles around ariana's thumb.  
  
"don't speak, ari. just try to relax and focus on me; my voice, my movements... just only me. please. think about only me."  
  
ariana wanted to fucking scream but she listened to what normani said. normani started to sing and kept the movements.  
  
_think about only me._  
  
honestly, ariana felt like she was in heaven right now even though she was short of breath. her voice was so beautiful and light and, god, she started crying again but in bliss. it was like ariana was in the room with an actual angel.  
  
she gradually felt her pain dissipate and her body stop seizing with each note normani sang and every touch felt. when normani giggled in one part of a song she messed up, ariana felt her heart leap in her chest.  
  
_she really met the perfect woman._  
  
when normani sensed ariana was calming down, she halted her actions and waited for ariana to respond to her. in a split second when normani looked down at the ground, ariana engulfed her into her arms, a strong lavender scent invading normani's senses, making normani give out a hearty laugh, making ariana's heart skip again.  
  
"thank you so much, mani. that's the fastest i calmed down with someone in the room."  
  
normani just responded with hugging ariana tighter, making ariana laugh, also making normani grin in ariana's shoulder blade like a loon.  
  
"anything for you, my tiny princess."

  
  
.

.

.

  
  
normani was upset. her album was delayed, yet again beyond her control. she promised her fans more music was coming in the summer and yet her work was being pushed back to november. she literally clenched her jaw so tightly when she got off the phone with her manager, threw it to the side and laid down in the tour bus bed. she didn't know how much time passed until she heard a voice calling her name out.  
  
"mani? you in here?"  
  
_ariana_.  
  
"yeah, in my bed."  
  
ariana pulled the curtain back and saw normani laying on her side.  
  
_beautiful. she's beautiful doing anything and nothing._  
  
ariana took off her heels and jacket and got in the in the bed with her, snuggling against her, throwing her arm around her torso eagerly. she felt normani relax against her and sigh.  
  
"what's up, mani?" ariana asked, her chin on shoulder blade and her nose in normani's hair, taking in her vanilla scent.  
  
_lavender and vanilla._  
  
normani was silent for a few seconds before speaking. "my album is delayed until november," ariana was waiting for normani to finish her thought. "i'm just annoyed because i wanted it to be out in JULY," normani giving out a long whine on july, making ariana silently laugh at her.  
  
_she was... so cute._  
  
"...and, ugh! they said the quality isn't 'up to par', whatever the loving fuck that shit means! but anyway, i have to rework tracks and sort out the tracklist AGAIN when i thought it was perfect already, fuck!" ariana knew normani was deeply frowning and agitated.  
  
it was silent for a couple minutes until ariana had a thought.  
  
"do you want a feature on it?"  
  
"huh?"  
  
"do you want a new feature on your album? or... wait!" ariana scurried off the bed, pacing around the limited space they had on the bus thinking. normani sat up watching the tiny girl who was animated in thought.  
  
"okay, is there a song that you think deserve a feature? right now? because i can lend my vocals or we can write a new song and we can push that as a single for you to hold people over! but don't worry if you don't want to do that. maybe if your album needs more, i can help you achieve that with your label and also i think it would be fun to do a track tog--"  
  
normani interrupted her rambling, "okay."  
  
"i... okay?"  
  
normani laughed and stepped closer to ariana, "yes okay, cute thing. but a new song for now because i like all the songs as is and i'm not changing the tracks without a fight. i think you're what i'm missing for my label, to be honest."  
  
ariana stepped even closer and grabbed normani's face to put their foreheads together.  
  
"i was hoping you'd say that, angel face. let's write a song, you and me. it'll be the best ever."  
  
she would do anything for the beautiful, deep brown skinned girl to be happy. she would do anything for her.

  
  
.

.

.

  
  
ariana was confused. she liked normani, no scratch that, she LOVED normani with everything she had in her but she didn't want to make the same mistake twice. she rushed things with pete and it legitimately backfired but normani, she's different. she makes ariana feel different. so much different. she's like no one she's met or even been with before. it intrigued her. she had a really good heart and spirit. she was her best friend in the short time they known each other and that made her chest tighten.  
  
_best friends._  
  
what if normani didn't feel the same?  
  
however, ariana knew that was bullshit so she put that thought to bed. they always touched each other, cuddled, had intimate looks towards each other, spoke in a language they only understood when they were with each other. she thought about normani's lips often; crashing on to hers, tasting only her. she thought about how normani would look going over the edge, climaxing in her arms. she thought about her hands feeling every inch of her body. she thought about how normani and her would giggle during sex. she thought about how normani would look every morning next to her and the morning, lazy sex. she thought those thoughts so much, she felt like she would snap at any minute and throw normani up a wall and fuck her so hard to the point where she would forget her own name.  
  
but instead, ariana acted out on her own hands on her body, plunging her own delicate fingers deep inside herself, letting her imagination and thoughts roam free without emotional repercussions. she was saying normani's name on her lips, like a prayer. flicking her nipple with her free hand, she kept going as deep as she possibly could, curling and twisting her two fingers in and out. she felt a light knot in the bottom of her stomach, making her go even faster. ariana kept up the pace until she finally came, with long drawn out moans of normani's name still on her lips, her body lightly giving out jolts.  
  
she layed there for a few minutes letting her body and mind calm down, wishing normani was there. on top of her, under her... what _fucking_ ever. she just wanted her there.  
  
she had to tell her. ariana need to tell normani how she felt or she would drive herself insane.  
  
ariana stumbled to the bathroom when she felt her body relax. she looked in the mirror and looked at her flushed face thinking  
  
tell her soon.  
  
_and she will._

she must.

  
.

.

.

  
  
normani was determined. all she wanted to do was tell ariana that she wanted to be hers. she didn't fucking care if people were lining up at ariana's door and had the most super annoying exes on earth. she was hers and hers only. she didn't know how to say it to her even though ariana knew more about her than most people on this earth did. they connected really quickly and they vibed so well together. she couldn't imagine life without her now and that's another reason she was terrified. rejection. she knew ariana felt the same. it was impossible for her not to. the way ariana stared at her and responded to her most times was way more than on a friendly level and normani was the same too. they had a connection, sure, but could it last? she literally wanted to make that petite girl scream bloody murder every night while she was under her.  
  
she had to tell her.  
  
_now._  
  
she had to tell her.

  
.

.

.

  
  
ariana was restless. the american leg of the sweetener tour was now over and she was in her loft in new york, laying in bed in the middle of the night. normani wanted to go back home to her family but ariana insisted she stayed with her a couple of days more (because she couldn't leave normani yet but she wouldn't say that out loud or admit that to anyone)  
  
ariana heard a knock on her door and then saw a head pop in slightly. ariana turned on the bedside lamp to see normani's face.  
  
"hi. i just wanted to see if you were busy..." letting the sentence trail off. ariana smiled at her, her dimple showing.  
  
"nah, come in."  
  
normani came in the room fully, shutting the door behind her. sliding under the dark sheets, she laid down, looking up at the ceiling. they stayed there in silence, just enjoying each others company. they had so many comfortable silences together and it was never awkward or forced between them.  
  
"ariana?"  
  
"yeah?"  
  
"i need to tell you something and it's gonna kill me inside if i don't."  
  
ariana sat up fully, giving normani her undivided attention. she watched as normani fidgeted with her hands.  
  
"mani?"  
  
"don't say anything. i just-- i just need to do this. i'm sorry if this will fuck us up in any way."  
  
normani grabbed ariana's arms and looked in her doe brown eyes that she could get lost in forever, simultaneously pulling her in closer. normani noticed that ariana's eyes looked so softer and had gold flecks in low lighting like this. ariana looked at her in wonder and normani looked back at her with the same curiosity. normani kept slowly pulling her in and ariana followed suit.  
  
normani pulled back, grinned so wide looking at ariana's lips. ariana tilted her head sideways, grinning wider, laughing uncontrollably.  
  
"we're so weird. if you want to kiss me, please do it. i've been waiting for this for months. literally the day i met you, even."  
  
normani didn't need to be told twice. she crashed her lips on ariana's. it was a very slow, shy kiss at first, both not wanting to lead anything until ariana was trying to enter her tongue in normani's mouth.  
  
_okay, here we go._  
  
normani let her have access and the kiss got heated, both letting out all the pent out sexual frustrations they had for each other, exploring each others mouths with so much passion and want.  
  
ariana pulled back, sucking on normani's bottom lip, resting her forehead against hers. she was smiling so big and normani was doing the same. ariana took normani's hands in hers, clasping them tightly.  
  
"mani, baby, i'm so happy. i wanted this for so fucking long. so long." ariana felt like her face was gonna split in two. "i should have said something sooner. i wanted to--" normani shut her up with a kiss.  
  
normani pulled back looking at ariana again, smiling, "it's fine, we're here now."  
  
"baby, i..." ariana trailed off for a second, "i-- i'm gonna be blunt but can you just fuck me, please. i wanted this for months, i can't stand it anymore."  
  
the mood suddenly shifted and normani laid ariana down, crushing her lips on the tiny woman with a hunger that was overwhelming for the both of them. in a frenzy, they pulled off their shirts, practically ripping them off in the process and took off their pajama pants and undergarments, throwing them wherever.  
  
normani got to work on ariana's neck, making ariana whimper. still kissing on ariana's neck, she cupped ariana's breast, slightly twisting her brown nipple, making ariana squeak and moan louder.  
  
"yes baby, i want to hear you." normani murmured against her tanned skin. pulling her mouth from ariana's neck (leaving a not so subtle hickey), she left a trail of kisses down to her breasts, and took her right nipple into her mouth, swirling her tongue around it. ariana was getting progressively louder at this point and that's what normani wanted.  
  
she wanted to make this girl scream for her and only her.  
  
normani used her free hand to rub the left nipple with her fingers, making ariana go insane. she switched movements and then after she was bored with that, she left light kisses down to her navel and then down some more and then...  
  
_yes._  
  
normani has only been with two women before her, sure, but she was marveling at ariana's pussy. it was really nice and when she spread her lips slightly, she was soaked. normani was about to have the time of her life with her, surely.  
  
"mani, please," ariana drew out a long whine, making normani silently chuckle. she slid one finger against her folds, making ariana whine again.  
  
"please, what?" normani taunted her.  
  
"NORMANI, FUCK! JUST FUCK ME, GOD!"  
  
again, she didn't need to be told twice. she took ariana's clit into her mouth, making ariana scream-yell. normani started to lightly suck and swirl her tongue around the sensitive area. normani then started to spread her lower lips and gave long licks around and on that area, making them both moan simultaneously at the actions. she then moved back up to her clit, sucking that lightly once more and then plunged two fingers deep inside ariana, curling them.

  
"oh fuck! normani!"  
  
ariana was moan singing for the gods and normani wanted to hear that noise for rest of her life. she added another finger, and she swore the neighbors could hear her but she didn't care. she was all hers now and she would never let go now.  
  
"mani, i'm about to--" ariana couldn't even finish her sentence. she was too much in ecstasy to form coherent thoughts. normani halted her movements, and moved up to ariana's lips, kissing her sloppily, still fingering her. ariana was moaning into the kiss which turned on normani so much, she could have came right then and there.  
  
normani pulled away from ariana's lips when she felt her tighten around her fingers, and her moans getting more broken and more desperate.  
  
"cum for me, baby. you better do that."  
  
and that was enough to send ariana over the edge, her eyes rolling back and vision going hazy, literally screaming out normani's name so loud, clawing the sheets and arching her back.  
  
_my god, she's so hot._  
  
normani still plunged into her, but lightly, helping her ride out her orgasm. she then pulled out, sucking on her fingers.  
  
_she tasted like a dream._  
  
normani then went back to give ariana a lazy kiss, making ariana taste herself on normani's mouth, which she easily enjoyed because they both moaned at the contact. pulling away once more, normani took ariana's arm and draped it around her body now laying on her chest.  
  
they stayed like that for awhile until...  
  
"it's my turn now," ariana said instructing normani to sit on her face, happily complying.  
  
"ari, wait-- oh god!"  
  
normani shut right up when she felt her warm tongue literally go straight up her core, literally thrashing.  
  
"i fucking can't! oh my god!"  
  
ariana was so good with her mouth, she could hardly take it anymore. it was so much. her senses were overloaded. she was squirming trying to escape from her grasp but ariana scooted her closer, locking her arms around normani's toned thighs tightly.  
  
"holy shit! i'm--"  
  
normani threw her head back, screaming and exploded on ariana's face and mouth. she really felt like she was on cloud 9 right fucking now. ariana eventually loosened her grip when normani stopped shaking and normani slowly got off ariana and snuggled against her side, both of them breathing heavily, trying to catch their breath.  
  
"hmm. how long did you love me, normani? i know it's love because we're on the same wavelength. if i love you then you love me too," sometimes ariana was super straightforward and that's the thing normani liked more about her with each passing day.  
  
"probably the day i found you having an anxiety attack," normani paused. "not like, the attack made me fall for you but that night in general. you were so cute and just... i saw you in a different light. i wanted to take care of you. always. from then on, i wanted to love you."  
  
ariana pondered on her reply before saying anything.  
  
"mine was the day you stood up for me when ricky hurt my feelings in front of everyone and i was visibly upset. remember that? but then also, my anxiety spell, like you said. i just thought you were perfect. you always are perfect to me."  
  
"wow. why did it take us so long to admit that to each other?" normani snorted and ariana laughed. "because we're fucking stupid and anxious yet chaotic messes," ariana shrugged.  
  
normani kissed her once more and god. she could kiss those lips forever and never get bored. she only started but she knew she would never get bored.  
  
"i love you so much, mani,"  
  
"i love you too."  
  
"be with me. stay with me," ariana practically cried.  
  
normani gave her quick kiss, "i'm never leaving you, baby."

ariana hummed, "so. can we go again?"

normani grinned, "shit, please."

and they were finally in their own lavish paradise for the rest of the night like they wanted to be for months.

  
  
.

.

.

 

  
they were happy. they were finally happy. ariana wanted to tell everyone about her relationship after the night they gave their all for each other and made it official and she did. she didn't care how people took it or how it would ruin her or her career or how people would say she's a serial dater. she loved the best woman in the world who had the skin of a goddamn goddess and a voice that would greet you in heaven. ariana finally had her. ariana never felt so loved and cared for by another person in her life. she wanted to be swallowed up by normani for the rest of her life. it wasn't fast or mismatched or shocking at all in her eyes. it was right and it was real. she loved normani and normani loved her too. fuck anyone who said otherwise.   
  
normani was the type to tell everyone about ariana. she was so happy and animated talking about her. the whole world teased her about it but she didn't care. she was sprung. she finally had ariana, the woman with big doe brown eyes and had the most stunning smile she's ever seen on another person. normani loved how easily ariana got embarrassed when normani complimented her to her family and friends. how when ariana literally hugs you so tight, you felt suffocated and you felt like the only person ever. how ariana was probably the most romantic and spontaneous person ever. normani loved everything about the tanned girl.

 

.

.

.

 

the song they wrote together, everyone loved it. it went to #1 on billboard and smashed various records. ariana sings it on tour all the time now, dedicating it to normani every night, calling normani her soulmate. normani also sings the song at her shows, calling ariana her everything. also singing it in ariana's ear every night (and all the lullabies they make every night with each other. over and over again). they even got matching couple tattoos (they were both super drunk. normani rolled her eyes after she realised what she done when sober but she wasn't even mad).

 

.

.

.

 

they fit together.

they loved and they loved each other.

and nothing was gonna break that.  **ever**.

 

.

.

.

 

 

  
**end.**


End file.
